Confessions Of A Real Life Cookie Monster

 Here we are on New Year's Eve and I think about how so many people, at the start of a new year, are quick to make resolutions with grand and mighty goals, strategize and go in fast and strong attacking bad habits and fighting to make changes, and then not long into the year, the resolutions die - whether by a slow decay or a huge crash-and-burn. Why does this happen?  See, for me, it's always led me to have the response of, "Well, then, I'm just not going to make any resolutions because I never keep them."  But 2016 has led me to make a bunch of changes, mostly small ones but a few large ones too, and after reading a book about habits (why and how they form and how to change them) I decided to look at this whole resolution thing again. So the next question is - how can I be different?  How can I be one of the few that make a resolution and keep it?  What do I need to change in order to make it stick?  Well, let's do some research.   Th...

This last week has been a blur... many preparations for Christmas including last minute everythings, early mornings, busy days and late nights a crucial part of the schedule.  Add in an amazing Christmas Eve church service, a fun-packed day with family yesterday, and today was a big decompressing day.  As I spent this last week listening to almost constant Christmas music (Isn't streaming amazing?!?!  Pandora and Amazon Prime Music have really hooked me up with a great selection!) I have noticed that, oddly, in all the mix of all the different types of Christmas songs, I can't think of any that include cookies.  Of course, most Christmas carols are religious in nature and I don't expect to have a song about Jesus mixed in with Bethlehem's finest  cookie recipe, but for how many songs we have about sleigh bells, silver bells, white snow, Santa, Rudolph, Frosty, chestnuts, and even pumpkin pie are mentioned - but no mention of Christmas cookies!  This is od...

It's been 3 days since I posted, and MAN am I frustrated.  I was so excited to be down 2 pounds, which I'm still holding, but one day of an "excuse" to start eating more junk turned into a FEW days of excuses, and then I don't find myself keeping other healthy habits.  Why is it that as SOON as I see some success, I start to sabotage myself?  I can't be the only one that does this, but I haven't really heard other people talk about it.  I get caught in this whole "deserve" cycle again, and I don't really understand where in my life it exactly started that I began to view sweets and junk food and soda as rewards for people who "deserve" them.  We had another spirit day at work on Friday, Disney day, which I was super excited about.  Dressed as Snow White, I even met up with a few other ladies from my department to make our costumes together.  My amazing department chair creates these super cool backdrops for us, and when sh...

Today was the day of my concert, and calories don't count in concert days (it's a rule I made up that I'd like to believe is true) so I'm not going to school all about my indulgences. That's part of living 80/20 - have you heard those principals?  One is that a healthy way of living is to make healthy choices 80% of the time and to have indulgences 20% of the day, and I planned for today to be a 20% day, for sure (which I actually didn't do all that bad!)  I still had my shake so I was good to go as far as cravings were concerned, and even turned down the free dessert bar....WHAAAAT?!?! For spirit week at work/school this week, we had Throwback Thursday, to which I wore my high school letterman jacket.  So, for fun, I found a picture of myself wearing it (I think this was the fall of my sophomore year) and took a picture today.  Here they are: It's funny because, shockingly, I prefer not only the picture of who I am today, but also the person.  ...

I ROCKED this morning!  I got up and out the door (still late, but it IS the last week before winter vacation and I noticed I'm not the only teacher on this downslide!) and went straight to work as a rational adult with no drive-through urges or internal temper tantrums - SCORE! I had some apple slices and my chocolate Shakeology at 9:30am, and I felt great.  Burst of energy, mood improved, not hungry, and no cravings.  We had a taco bar planned for lunch today, which I was prepared for, and then my dad sent me a text asking if he could bring... dun dun DUN... McDonald's for lunch.  But I did OK!  I asked him to bring me nuggets instead of a quarter pounder (don't give me grief - I split the calorie and fat content in TWO just by making that switch!) and had him bring a small fry and a small drink instead of the usual larger ones.  AND  I didn't even eat it all because I didn't feel that I needed it.  I was still going to go by the taco ba...

Oddly, after another night's sleep that was too short, I felt much better this morning.  I wasn't taking my daughter to daycare today, so I had about 10 extra minutes of time to spare, which was AWESOME.  Of course with me, that means I have just enough time to swing through the drive through at McDonalds on my way into work.  Sausage muffin, Diet Coke... wait a minute, I'm trying harder to be healthy... CRAP! Then I started a battle in my brain, trying to justify why one more little morning at McDonald's wasn't going to make or break the day, how I don't have these extra minutes so often, how I can push my shake back to lunch instead of breakfast, etc.  About seven minutes went by on this battle in my brain, and then it was decision time.  My stomach grumbled as I pulled up to the dreaded rintersection.  To go right would take me to work.  To go left would take me to McD's.  I could feel my arms desiring to turn left, but I said "NOPE" out loud...

As a mom of young kids, it seems no matter what time I go to bed, I won't get a good night's sleep.  ESPECIALLY when I happened to stay up late the night before.  Last night, I was so excited starting this blog, that I went to bed late, and then as I lay in bed TRYING to fall asleep, I kept imagining I heard my son getting out of bed and was listening to hear if he came into the room - how stupid is that?  Well, I did fall asleep, around 11:45, and knowing that I had to get up less than 6 hours later, I wasn't thrilled, but it was fine. What I didn't expect, though, is that my daughter would be the one to wake up early (which she has NEVER done until the last few mornings, ugh) and was wide awake at 4:53am today, proclaiming loudly, "Mommy, I has a good night's seep!" Needless to say, I was dragging getting out of bed, but luckily at work (I'm a teacher and this is the last week before Christmas vacation... woop woop!) we had a coffee bar this...

My name is Stacey, and I am a real life cookie monster.  I have loved desserts my entire life, and actually, as a baby, my first word (besides mama and dada) was...  true story....  "COOKIE!"  I grew up on straight apple juice, high octane Kool-Aid, and fresh homemade baked goods almost daily.   Add to that genetics which show me a glimpse into my future where I will always have a struggle with weight, two babies who have permanently changed my body upon their exits, and a whole ton of bad habits and only a glimmer of willpower, and...  here I am.  I am 34 years old, and I am tired.  I'm tired of the struggle to put myself first, my healthy self, my potential self.  The self that I have put first is the self that gets tired working full time and "deserves" the pizza and dessert, the self that LOVES sweets, the self that doesn't like to see food wasted (you know, the "finish-all-the-food-on-your-plate" generation) so I eat all the lefto...